Bent-O [S9W11]

A slow drizzle seems to hovering in the air more than falling from the sky; together with the dying sunlight, they give the narrow alleyways and their flotsam of junk a bleaker air than usual. Hands deep in your pockets and your head hunched in your collar, you step around the corner, already picturing the comfort of being indoor, the cold beer and the food.
To your surprise, there is a queue outside the place. You slow down and approach it, unsure of what to do, when the door slides open and the owner's head pops out. He frowns looking at the short line of customers, but his expressions brightens at your sight and he waves you in. As you pass the others awaiting suckers, you swear you can hear a snarl coming from a hooded shape.
For the first time there are some other occupants along the counter, sitting one stool apart from each other. The first one, a stocky fellow with green skin, massive jaw and a leather cap, tackles methodically his chow as if he had a beef with it. The other one, a stubby and stout, bearded individual, seems more interested in his massive tankard of beer. Both give you the slightest and neutral of nods as you take your seat.
The room seems to be particularly full. The usual figures are here: the jolly fur hat wearers, the grunting hulks, the colossal eater. A trio of small hooded figures chitter joyously while picking in their bowl. In a corner a ghastly pale, if elegant man, seem to be holding court over a couple of depressed looking souls. In the back of the room a tall, pointy-eared, red-haired customer dances - bare-chested and barefoot- on a table; summoning roaring cheers and toasts around him. A pair of tiny, twitchy blue lizards hop between tables, looking for a place to sit.
"Quite the crowd, eh?" The owner slides both the menu and a beer to you, in smooth movement. "We keep expanding the backroom, and more keep coming in. You saw the queue outside, first time we have customers waiting. The regulars will never, though." He winks at you. "I always thought I'd be able to handle all of this on my own, but it looks like I am going to have to get someone to help me. Maybe for next season.The owner then scratches his head pensively, his gaze lost in the cluster of patrons. 
This time you jump on the opportunity to ask about this concept of seasons and breaks. "Well, you see, in my branch we work by seasons. It can be quite intensive really, as you can witness yourself." He designates the rest of the place with a wide gesture of his arm, almost toppling some condiments lined up on the counter. "We still have a couple of weeks left and then we'll get into the post season. This place will close, momentarily. Then we'll see what to do for next season, maybe move to something with a bit more room." Seeing your face, he gives you his trademark smile and taps the menu with a finger. "Don't worry, I know places where you can get that kind of things while I'm off. Now if you'll excuse me..."
He trundles out, wiping his brow and muttering about aggravating buggers who never heard of tipping. You turn back to the menu and try to concentrate on what's offered this week.

Division 1: The cream of the crop, tasked into attracting customers every day of the year.

Catastrophy (1780TV Chaos) vs The Flying Rainbow Ponies (1490TV Helves) - Recipe 
Chaos dishes are scarce this season, High Elves are a stable value. Two customs that combine to reveal the best of each other. A subtle but infernal curry.
Outline: When a dish like that lands before you, do not expect balance.
3-1 for Flying Rainbow Ponies

Doomed Witches (2270TV Delves) vs Shadowhill Cowboys (1510TV Delves) - Recipe 
A meeting of Dark Elves chefs is always an exquisite moment for the true lovers of sinister gastronomy. Expect the whole 16 dishes Dark Elves feast.
Outline: A symphony of sinister culinary arts, served by masters in their trade.
3-2 for Shadowhill Cowboys

Division 2: If division 1 is the lure, Division 2 is the hook with it's unexpected twists.

The Phobias Reborn (1830TV Undeads) vs The Rat Way to Go  (1720TV Rats) - Recipe 
Tartare façon Undead and his side of Skaven sour cream. Maybe not the most notorious of classics, but cedes in nothing to the others.
Outline: Fair warning to the lactose intolerant, high levels of Skaven dairy.
3-1 for The Rat Way To Go

Children of Ymir (2250TV Dorfs) vs The Arcana (1380TV Prelves)  - Recipe 
It is often said not to put together Dwarf bread and Elvish jams; for the latter's subtlety is almost always lost in the process. But some keep believing...
Outline: Sometimes the unexpected happen, to keep us dreaming.
4-2 for The Arcana

Division 3: Where beauty and moodiness coexist, the high-school years of Big O teams.

School of Dance (1890TV Welves) vs Leaping Lizardss (1690TV Lizards) - Recipe 
Wood Elves game dishes doing well this season. Then someone had the idea to mix it with a serving of some popular Lizardmen steamed fish.
Outline: A nice try at "Surf&Turf " - still with a slight unbalance.
4-1 for School of Dance

Never Swapping (1760TV Necros) vs Sôdai Senlin (1520TV Zons) - Recipe 
The return of a lettered experiment from past season. Time to figure out if Amazon honeys could mature as well as Necro pickles.
Outline: A slightly one-sided, if predictable, result for a well crafted Necro ensemble.
2-0 for Never Swapping

Divisions 4: A place where things come to life, the endless miracle of birth and growth.

Bright Moon Poets (1610TV Necro) vs Queens of the memes (1600TV Zons) - Recipe 
The pendant to the previous proposition. Still rough for a dessert, but with flavors you will not find anywhere else.
Outline: The proof of Amazon delights potential when handled properly.
2-1 for Queens of the memes

Bulldoserz (1660TV Chorfs) vs Celebrity Veg 2.0 (1510TV Kislevs) - Recipe 
After last week's attempt, Chorf hooch is back for dessert. This time married with the weekly quota of Kislev cuisine de rigueur.
Outline: Kislev ice-cream and Chorf firewater - snow cone done extreme.
3-0 for Celebrity Veg 2.0

Bonus
Une fois n'est pas coutume.
As we were putting the finishing touches on this Bent-O, a special game was being played. Consequently, for those of you amateurs of AG teams with their dose of fancy runs, passes and sudden death; a special treat this week:
Capital Rats (1740TV Rats) vs Rivendell Jets (1750TV Helves) - Recipe Video
 

Acknowledgements.
This weekly piece, with its qualities and short comings, wouldn't exist without many other contributions. Hence the following words of gratitude: to the admins, technicians, recappers, writers and coaches for taking on their time to make ReBBL a splendid place to enjoy our Blood Bowl hobby.

More specific and personal thanks, in alphabetical order:

  • Cynergy: Member of [O₂] clan. Coach of "The Nurgtown Crooners". Big O streamer. Recapper of division 3. Proud owner of a ReBBL mug. Blitzes people into submission.
  • Fyrs: Coach of "Saturday Night Femur". Recent arrival but very active in the Big O community and other competitions. Has an unnatural attraction for really strong mummies. Sometimes offer commentary-free broadcasts of some ReBBL games.
  • Gypsy Prince: Coach of "One Punch Ogre". REL streamer. Our editor-in-chief here at the news section, recently gave the whole thing a sexy facelift. Many thanks for enduring us and putting on the hard work.
  • Krusader: Leader of [bOot] clan. Coach of "Muten Roshi Bear's School". Big O streamer. Recapper of divisions 1&2. Always brings in quality co-casters. Developed a recent passion for skydiving into war zones.
  • Majorbyte: Coach of "Âlve". The tireless worker behind ReBBL.net, your one-stop shop for rankings, scheduled games and the newest articles. You're slowly putting me out of business, sir, but it is beautiful to watch. Hat off.
  • PapaNasty: Leader of [O] clan, coach of "Bash Incorporated". Big O streamer. Offers late games streams of his games. Keeps a kindly eye on future Big O coaches. Can think in 8 different time zones at once, daylight savings included.
  • Schlice: Member of [O₂] clan. Coach of the "Ratfuckers United". Thank him every time you see the match reports, check the play-offs brackets and the match summaries, or sell rats on the market. Writes arcane stuff on Nufflytics.
  • Seriasssam: Member of clan [HrsY]. Coach of "Leaping Lizardss". Big O Streamer. Recapper of division 4A. A recent and active addition to the community as well. Saii_Maa's padawan. Prays for OP skinks.
  • Tommo: Member of [O₂] clan. Coach of "The Arcana". Big O Streamer. As passionate a streamer as he is talented coaching Elves. Known for his sharp play-by-play analysis.

- Zee

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