Bent-O [S9W12]

This time the queue is even longer when you arrive. No drizzle tonight, but the low hanging fog keeps everyone in a diffuse shroud of humidity. Far back from the queue, a couple of bloated silhouettes gurgle softly to each other, sending whiffs of putrefaction on the wind. Between them and the rest, a moody fellow in black, slick, clothing is leaning against the wall in a half-mysterious, half-pouty posture. 
The rest of the queue is a mix of stubby bearded individuals, tall lanky ones with extravagant hair does, a couple of squatting, chittering hooded shadows passing the time rolling dice with a feathered woman and a rather unremarkable human. No one pays you any attention when you walk along them and slip past the door.

Inside, the place seems to slowly slide even more into a kaleidoscopic pandemonium each time you get in. The counter is almost full: the green-skinned cap-wearing customer is back, two leather-clad pointy-eared females seem to be drawing on the counter between bites; you have to seat between a very hairy fellow whose tail drops on the floor, and a silent character all clad in armor.
As you take your seat, your hairy neighbor notices your gaze and flashes you a grin of unnaturally pointy teeth. "It's the full moon, pal. Just stop me if I start lapping up my soup". Your turn around, slightly embarrassed, just in time to notice the decayed face of your other neighbor looking blankly at you. He winks and sips from a glass bottle of passion fruit soda with a straw. His faint smell of formaldehyde is barely noticeable over the spicy perfume of the restaurant.

Your eye finally catches the figure of the owner, in the back, darting from one table to another. He picks up the plates from the pointy-eared haughty fellows's table, slides a couple of menus to the hulking grunting trio, exchange a few jokes with the laughing fur hats, dodges expertly some bouncy small reptiles rushing between tables, drops beer mugs for a couple of half-naked tattooed men. A true acrobat show. The room seems to be cracking at the seams, close to bursting, while still feeling like it keeps expanding just enough to fill up again every time.
A shiny bald pate finally signals the owner returning back to the counter. He seems to be sweating profusely but the smile on his face looks the genuine article."Glad to have you over!" He smoothly slides into the shadowy realm of the kitchen, drops his pile of platse and cups with a crash and steps out again to hand you the menu.

He then leans over the counter and plops down the usual glass of cold beer in front of you. "Things are going amazing. Barely have time to speak... nor think, really." He waves proudly at the place. "Lot of them come here to relax, like you, others to celebrate. We even have some visitors from afar". You wonder what afar means for him, consider the unusual mosaic of customers filling the place. "I can't tell you how much I'm looking forward to taking a break, but it is really exhilarating to see the end of our first season." He nods to himself and grunts. "We have plan for the future you know. More people. A larger place. Better menus. Take-out. Next season will be brilliant, you'll see!"
Answering a call from the kitchen, he dives back in before coming out dual wielding bowls of stew and cups of water. "I'll be right baaaaack" seems to be his cry, as he disappears in the nebula of tables and customers. You shrug before grabbing this week's menu.

Division 1: The mahogany case to our foremost selection.  

Doomed Witches (2150TV Delves) vs Warc Machine III (1880TV Orcs) Recipe
We, here in the Big O, never say no to a Dark Elves casserole with its Orcish green mushroom sauce. It's a classic.
Outline: As always, proof that a classic dish can still surprise you.
2-1 for Warc Machine III

Shadowhill Cowboys (1540TV Delves) vs Teenage Mutant Ninja Goblins (1430TV Underworld) Recipe 
Eyebrows were raised at the notion of tampering with dark bisque when some decided to add a dash of mineral.
Outline: A reminder that you need to be easy on the warpstone.
2-0 for TNMG

Division 2: Intense collection, with its unique eclecticism.

The 08th MS Team (1700TV Vamps) vs The Rat WayTo Go (1840TV Rats) Recipe 
What better to have with a selection of Skaven cheese than a glass of Vampire red ? I heard countries built their entire culture around that.
Outline: The sharpness of Skaven cheese, the voluptuous Vampire wine... mmhh.
2-1 for The 08th MS Team

Old Hobart Honeybadgers (1890TV Helves) vs Red Skulls Go Faster (2080TV Orcs) Recipe 
The encounter of High Elves ceviche and Orc tartare. A refreshing union perfectly served either as starter or as main course.
Outline: The meeting of opposite styles, the yin and yang, if yin was green and yang was silver...
2-1 for the Old Badgers

Division 3: Future trends, for fine palates and strong stomachs.

Leaping Lizardss (1600TV Lizards) vs Sassy Soviets (1760TV Kislevs) Recipe 
An encounter of two popular ethnic cuisines. Kislev beetroot soup and its side of Lizard maize tortilla.
Outline: The meeting of two worlds for a unique experience.
2-1 for Sassy Soviets

Fork Tonnes (1540TV Lizards)  vs The Scuffling Dead (1530TV Necros) Recipe 
Two of your most trending side dishes: pickled vegetables and guacamole, an expected recurrence this season.
Outline: A combination strong from the first bite on.
2-0 for Scuffling Dead

Divisons 4: The adventurous way to finish your tasting.

Masters of the Underverce (1540TV Underworld) vs Gods Of Fate (1670TV Helves) Recipe 
A new take on an all-time favorite : High Elf delicate mousse with a special zing to spice it up.
Outline: Always a sensitive preparation, especially while adding warpstone.
2-0 for Unders of the Mastervece

Krakozhors (1420TV Orcs) vs Khorne's Elf Experiment (1590TV Prelves) Recipe 
Pro Elves can offer the most underrated sweets while Orcs are famous or their all-around efficiency.
Outline:  Orcish coffee, beware of the punch.
2-1 for Krakozhors

Fortune Cookie: Any vision, however ephemeral, can carry multiple lessons.  

This weekly piece, with its qualities and short comings, wouldn't exist without many other contributions. Hence the following words of gratitude: to the admins, technicians, recappers, writers and coaches for taking on their time to make ReBBL a splendid place to enjoy our Blood Bowl hobby.

More specific and personal thanks, in alphabetical order:

  • Cynergy: Member of [O₂] clan. Coach of "The Nurgtown Crooners". Big O streamer. Recapper of division 3. Proud owner of a ReBBL mug. Will not let 1s get him down.
  • Fyrs: Coach of "Saturday Night Femur". Recent arrival but very active in the Big O community and other competitions. Has an unnatural attraction for really strong mummies. Sometimes offer commentary-free broadcasts of some ReBBL games.
  • Gypsy Prince: Coach of "One Punch Ogre". REL streamer. Our editor-in-chief here at the news section, recently gave the whole thing a sexy facelift. Many thanks for enduring us and putting on the hard work.
  • Krusader: Leader of [bOot] clan. Coach of "Muten Roshi Bear's School". Big O streamer. Recapper of divisions 1&2. Mumbles while playing Magic. Works on secret projects, mumbles about this as well.
  • Majorbyte: Coach of "Âlve". The tireless worker behind, your one-stop shop for rankings, scheduled games and the newest articles. You're slowly putting me out of business, sir, but it is beautiful to watch. Hat off.
  • PapaNasty: Leader of [O] clan, coach of "Bash Incorporated". Big O streamer. Offers late games streams of his games. His heart is said to beat for the pass game, behind this bash cover.
  • Schlice: Member of [O₂] clan. Coach of the "Ratfuckers United". Thank him every time you see the match reports, check the play-offs brackets and the match summaries, or sell rats on the market. Writes arcane stuff on Nufflytics.
  • Seriasssam: Member of clan [HrsY]. Coach of "Leaping Lizardss". Big O Streamer. Recapper of division 4A. A recent and active addition to the community as well. Doesn't like "Leap" despite his team name.
  • Tommo: Member of [O₂] clan. Coach of "The Arcana". Big O Streamer. As passionate a streamer as he is talented coaching Elves. Shines when being the underdog. Can't seem to let Pro Elves go.

- Zee

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