There are strange signs of activity in the alleys tonight. On your way to your usual hideaway, you first pass a Dwarf stuffed in an elvish looking leather jacket playing fetch with a dog. Then strange cries seem to erupt from the area of the restaurant, or whatever this establishment identifies itself with.
You quickly discover the source of it: opposite the entrance a vociferous individual is perched on a soap box. His whole body arched toward the restaurant, he flails around with a wooden spoon and repeatedly cries "Too Many Tickets!" He seems to be frothing at the mouth; and you can't tell if the strange colors on his contorted face are the result of the neon lights or his tantrum.
Leaning against the wall next to the door, you find the owner smoking his thin pipe. He looks at the scene with an unimpressed gaze and stands up as you approach. "Irasshai!" He waves you in, and steps behind you after tapping his pipe against the wall. "Don't mind him, he does that from time to time. Must be the full moon, or something." As you both pass a minotaur-like figure hunched at the counter, the owner taps it gently on the shoulder. "Still punchy after this week's game" he tells you in a stage whisper.
You sit at your usual spot, and get ready to nurse your traditional glass of beer. The owner is busy pouring on the other side of the counter. "They all came back this week. We're pretty full. Always a sight for sore eyes... Mine at least!" he says with a chuckle. The large room seems well filled with people and roars of laughter. You notice a few scenes in the crowd.
At a table a large reptile eats with cautious movements, mindful of the cast around its arm. Next to him a Dwarf eyes pensively over his beer tankard at the hooded coat of rat-like figure. A pointy eared, haughty fellow spins a ball on his fingers under the dull gaze of a bloated goat. A large silhouette, wrapped up from head to toe, is sat at the next table over in front a pile of calendars and plane tickets. A large brute with a heavy helmet on seem to wander aimlessly between the tables until one of the waiters comes to guide him.
At the second floor gallery, a couple of jumpy skinks seemed to practice a celebratory dance. A lumbering character watches them with a contemplative look on his scarred face. In a room behind them, the flannel shirt wearing brute with a heavy helmet flips around a calendar in a company of a blue faced evil-looking dwarf.
Further up, you also notice for the first time the opening of the top floor gallery. At the rail, a couple of fur toque wearers laugh loudly at a third one, who throws them unamused looks. The doors of a private room let show a mailed green character and a mohawk sporting individual both holding a corner of the star chart they are studying.
You are drawn from your contemplation by the sound of the slate the owner slides towards you. "Enjoy! The food... and the atmosphere!" He laughs heartily, diving into the throng of patrons...
Div 1: recommended seasonal specialties, never the wrong choice.
Lazy Lounge Lizards UTD (1780 Lizards) vs Old Hobart Honeybadgers (1900 Helves) - Recipe
To open today let's start with this encounter of Helf and Lizard cuisine: the scallop cream and curry pie; prepared by two regulars of the kitchen top ranks. Maybe not the flashiest of dishes but it would be criminal to disregard such quality product.
1-0 for Lazy Lounge Lizards UTD
Catastrophy (1910 Chaos) vs School of Dance (1810 Welves) - Recipe
For those looking for more extravagant cooking here is your stop. When the Welf art of dressing and sauces meets some Chaos prime beef meat, some just cannot stop drooling expectantly. Sit down, and enjoy a top notch fondue bourguignonne.
3-2 for School of Dance
Div 2: raw meat and minced organs in strong sauces, all fresh.
Fork Tonnes (1610 Lizards) vs Never Swapping (1930 Necro) - Recipe
Now if you want some more meat, try this unique burger. Prepared with the freshest Necro ground meat (don't ask) and paired with beetroot and pineapple from the Lizard lands, it will rock your world. You will never find this anywhere else.
The Nurgtown Crooners (1890 Nurgle) vs Da Kahoonaz (1620 Orcs) - Recipe
Let it never be said that Big O cannot produce some unique dishes. For example, this week we have for you a very special combination borne out of a marriage from Nurgle and Orcish culinary traditions: the Portobello and Vegemite stir-fry!
2-0 for The Nurgtown Crooners
Div 3: selection of savoury side dishes, all about that umami.
Gods of Fate (1670 Helves) vs Cyrus's Viruses (1470 Nurgle) - Recipe
If there is something the Big O can stand proudly for, it is its very special culinary diversity. But we will admit some of them can be a bit rough to start with. Try this Nurgle Kānga pirau and savor the splendor of Helf cream, if you can beat the smell.
2-0 for Gods of Fate
Div 4: a step into the weirder, for the brave culinary explorer.
Chaos From Laos (1750 Chaos) vs Clash of Comrades (1480 Kislev) - Recipe
Some people tend to forget that the Big O is traversed by Summer and Winter at the same time. And what better than a Kislev sweet and sour stew for winter? A Kislev sweet and sour stew with Chaos style duck blood and fiery peppers in it!
3-1 for Chaos from Laos
Divs 5: desserts and sweets, to finish your meal or for a treat.
Rocky Road to Redemption (1080 Brets) vs Heavy Metal Massacre (1160 Necro) - Recipe
Now. Try the traditional Brettonian crêpes with a a scoop or two of Necro salted butter caramel ice cream, and you'll come back for more. Be careful when preparing this at home with salt levels. Overcooked crêpes can easily taste like shoe soles too.
Very Dead Corpses (1360 Necro) vs Feudal Fun (1240 Brets) - Recipe
As we're no strangers to variations on a same theme, we offer you another dessert from Necro and Brettonian origin. A tasty, creamy fard breton filled with prunes preserved in the purest Necro tradition. Tasty, but one should not have too much at once.
1-0 for Very Dead Corpses
Deepest thanks go to all the admin staff and tech wizards making possible for all of us to meet, play and write about Blood Bowl.
Here's a list of Big O streamers you should follow; for future time quality Blood Bowl:
- AussieViking: Coach of Winged Centaurs, co-host of Div 3 recaps with Fyrs, victim of a Halfling bounty hunter.
- Cynergy: Coach of The Nurgtown Crooners, host of Div 2 recaps with Nick, finally stopped hemorrhaging rotters.
- Fyrs: Coach of Saturday Nyght Femur, co-host of Div 3 recaps with AussieViking, currently traveling to
- GdayNick: Coach of The Ball Pinchers, co-caster of Div 2 recaps alongside Cynergy, kills Witch Elves in cold blood.
- Krusader: Coach of Muten Roshi's Bear School, host of Div 1 recaps with XS, looks forward to Christmas family time.
- PapaNasty: Coach of Bash Incorporated, host of Div 5B recaps, changes nappy on the go, probably just lost Bruce.
- Rhys: Coach of That's Chaos Theory, host of Div 5 A recaps, survived a savage attack by a vindictive Dorf maniac.
- Seriassam: Coach of Leaping Lizardss, enjoys solo casting when others get mangled, hates the Detailed Dice Log.
- SkyblueMonty: Coach of Monty's Tosspots, leader of the Endzone Conga line, will play Vamps for money.
- Tommo: coach of The Arcana, host of Div 4 recaps with Jamus, King of Space, on the Path of Exile.