Hello everyone! Playoffs are on the horizon now, which means that I can pull out the division predictor and… never mind. College leagues apparently aren’t set up for it. Well, that’s a shame. I guess I can give my own, biased, playoff chances instead.

In other news, I cocasted a game in americas A the other day, and safe to say (with a sample of 1 game) this is definitely the better division in terms of quality (ne). If anyone casting a game or streaming their own game would like a cocaster I’m happy to come in and do some analysis, just ping me in discord! 

One minute league signups are in theory closed, but if anyone wants some extra bloodbowl seek out Zee and he might be able to fit you in last minute, especially if you can play America time. One minute turns and no rerolls are a great way to get better at the game, while playing against top draw opposition. Said top draw opposition may be running a meme roster but their fundamentals will still be at a serious level, so give it a go.

That’s all the admin I can think of, so onto the rankings.

Rank 1

Cursed Cowboy’s (Dimmy Gee)

5-1-0 (no change) 

The Cowboy’s have managed to wrangle their way into a commanding lead, not something you expect to see from chaos this early on. Coached by someone who sounds like they’ve seen all of what the chaos gods have to offer, this is a ridiculous but still vulnerable roster and no result is guaranteed.

Dimmy beat both dark elf coaches back to back, which implies a solid understanding of what it takes to beat agility as well as bash matchups. That said, there was no wrestle and no wizard to contend with so the agi matches could still be a W.I.P area. Tom Horn’s bold choice of skill has been more than rewarded by Tzeench, and dimmy now has two strength 5 pieces on his turn, one with mighty blow. 

The run in is all av9, with the week 8 matchup vs jorcajo most likely deciding the division. The orcs and dwarves have more guard and a lot more block, so the money would be against the Cowboy’s. Staying unbeaten will put the rest of college on notice for sure, with Jessie James and co potentially making a deep playoff run.

Chance of making playoffs: 87.5%

Rank 2

The Garlic Orcs of Athena (jorcajo)

4-2-0 (no change)

Jorcajo is the quiet horse in this race. All the development is standard good orc stuff, and the GOA have picked up two 2-0 wins to keep within a game of Dimmy at the top. They have the most surfs inflicted in the league (7) and the joint best defense, so if it wasn’t for some buff goats running around then these guys would be getting all the attention.

K’non is the closest to a standout piece, and the goal now is to try funnel spp to the other 3 blorcs whenever safe to do so. Next up are the winless pro elves, but without any tackle Jorcajo will need to not get carried away else they may drop points. The 1st vs 2nd match is in the orc favour, since the orcs just have better stats and more reliable levels. What we don’t know is whether the coaches can handle the pressure. It could be a classic.

I’ve not watched them play, but statistically jorcajo looks like a solid coach, and I’m sure SIESTA and Muppetillo will be keeping an eye on this promising rookie for the next clan season. ¡Todo lo mejor!

Chances of making playoffs: 70%

Rank 3

Karond Kar Jailors (Berzeroth)

3-1-2 (↑2)

After a rough 2-0 loss against the Cowboys, Berzeroth bounced back to beat the lizards in a 3-2 thriller. This is the best agi roster in the division, notwithstanding Genraleyth (one of the best sacking pieces in the game!) getting block ahead of wrestle. Cadthel has a heavy workload now, but is currently the difference between this team and the Speedies. Wrestle is just that important.

The reason behind the jump is mainly the schedule, in that it’s really soft. The run in is Dawi (bottom half), Necro (10th) and Nurgle (baby). 19 points should be a playoff berth the way other leagues are shaping up, and if he can get past Troy with 3 points then Berzeroth suddenly looks really good. That said, Jobey has a 2 point head start meaning that the Jailors might find themselves in 4th, but ahead of 6 other 3rd place teams!

At 1320 tv after 6 games, the foundation is set for the Jailors. Now they need to execute. Winning games on the bloodbowl pitch would also be a good idea.

Chances of making Playoffs: 40%(??)

Rank 4

The Edgy Speedies (JobeyObey)

4-0-2 (↓1)

Going down 2-1 against a baby chaos team is a hard pill to swallow, especially when it ends your title hopes. The speedies need to pick themselves up off the floor and get 3 points against the Orc Varieties, with anything less putting them in a massive dogfight. There’s good news in the form of Ridfir and Banereth filling out the roster, taking it to 12 good players.

Jobey must be reading these rankings, since he’s added a passing game to the team. 5 passes in 2 games is great, helping bridge the spp gap to his rivals. Said gap hasn’t been helped by the passing of Malral, whom I highlighted last time. This is a really cruel twist of the dice, since the Speedies have only given up 29 blocks a game on average. Death is a fact of life though, as any dark elf worth their salt will tell you. Being impaled by a Gor is not the ideal way to go however.

Their playoff hopes all of a sudden hinge on next week's game. It’s going to be tense.

Chances of making playoffs: 37.5%

Rank 5

Ork Varieties (lavalamps122)

3-1-2 (↓1)

Jobeyobey isn’t the only coach to suffer a loss of development. Ambrosia tripped into an agi bust, and was promptly sacked. Geheimrat has come right in to replace however, and the Varieties now rock a bench. This means that they can field blanket av9 on defense, which is always a good thing in a rookie division.

Cosmic Crisp takes kick ahead of dirty player, which is interesting given the bench in play. It may be a schedule oriented skill aimed at exploiting skink pickups in 2 weeks time. The main issue is the lack of casualties caused, but when you’re only breaking armour 22% of the time then there’s only so much you can do. Maybe a sacrifice to Nuffle or, failing that, Gork might be needed.

Losing to nurgle wasn’t part of the plan. It puts them behind in the 3 horse race for 3rd place, and lavalamps has the toughest run-in. A win this week helps out, but then it’s a straight race between orcs and elves and elves are generally quicker. They won’t go down without a fight.

Chances of making playoffs: 20%

Rank 6

E-Reptile Dysfunctional (goofd)

2-1-3 (↑2)

They’ve only gone and done it. They’ve gotten 6 saurus and a kroxigor onto the pitch at the same time. It only took two visits to a skink priest and the intervention of a slann, but finally goofd has their full roster. I mean they still lost to dark elves 3-2, and still have a losing record, but when you look at the rest of the teams below them there isn’t much more to shout about.

Shenron is apparently about to roll into some movement, but in the meantime goofd still has pretty much a rookie team, with a mv5 blitzer. Which really sucks since it’s going to sap spp like crazy until replaced. With 1st place and the best dark elf roster still to play, any points are good points. At least there’s no claw out there.

Playoffs are a pipe dream, but 11 points would be a great way to head into minors (assuming we keep the team). Another good goal would be to not concede any surfs and try and inflict some, which requires some planning on defense but will really help out a team with no MB. One for next season.

Chances of making playoffs: 1%

Rank 7

Grufbar Zhufbar(Troy_Tempest)

1-1-3 (no change)

It looks like the dwarves are going to pick up a much needed bye week 3 points, taking them to 2-1-3 hence the 7th place. Almost every piece is in mvp range, so development is also expected. After not really turning up to the orc fixture 2 weeks ago, Troy needs to get some fire back into his players down the stretch and get in the best possible position for minors.

The defensive playbook has proven to be very reliant on blitzes, and needs sharpening up. The offense has only scored 3 tds all season, and the schedule looks tough. But when you only break armour on 14 (fourteen)% of all blocks across 6 games, sometimes there’s only so much you can do. It's easy to get disheartened when you lose 2 blockers in the 1st 2 turns of a game, especially without a bench.

Playoffs? These guys just want to hurt something. There’s some really good looking pieces coming through however, so watch out in 2 seasons where these guys take div 4 of the majors by storm!

Chances of making playoffs: 0.5%

Rank 8

Mouldy Shamblers (__Yor__)

3-1-2 (↓2)

After a brief surge of form, the Shamblers were put back in their place by a dominant Jorcajo. Going up against a team with better stats and skills than you is always a tough ask however, and Yor will be looking forward to the rematch in 2 seasons time when he has things like claw and mighty blow.

No development to report on, the only note is that Ole Leech needs sacking since there is no bench, and a loner now does his hob better. Aternia comes in as the last nurgle warrior, meaning that the Shamblers get all their stink back just in time for the dark elves in week 8.

Sitting in the slow lane, this is a team that wants to avoid playoffs like, well, the plague. They’re still competitive however, and will be trying to take points of every team they face. This is a big improvement on the start of the season, and proof that if you stick with your team then things can happen.

Chances of making playoffs: 1*10^-3

Rank 9

Everlorn Eagles (Oldyella)

0-1-5 (no change)

Two 1-0 losses later, the Eagles are at the bottom. Such is early pro elf life. Either they shoot to playoffs or tank a little. There’s shoots of hope though, with Aeraeme getting to blodgestep and enough winnings meaning that Castien can get sacked before they take any more spp away. Two linemen with ridiculous names have made it to level 2 and dodge, which increases the likelihood of a bench.

And that’s… kinda it. 13 passes is great, that’s major league numbers, but it can always be higher. J J Cash made 12 in his first season with rookie chaos, imagine what pro elves can get up to! If you’re struggling for inspiration, Andydavo’s dark elves are the template to follow, complete with tons of youtube vods full of vanity passing.

This is another team ducking playoffs, but watch out for minors when the positionals start to come online. 38 blocks a game conceded is a touch on the high side, but that might be inflated by some early games, potentially the coaches first ever games. The only way is up.

Chances of making playoffs: low.

Rank 10

Pink Penguinz (b3sh)

0-1-4 (no change)

Drama in the necro camp, as they failed to appear on time for this week’s game. Rumours are running rampant, and zombies are still stealing mvps.

One rumour is that Frankenstein’s Butler, fed up of being the most developed positional (he’s a flesh golem for christ’s sake), went on a rampage, destroying 3 goons before going on strike.

Another is that Vlad AKA Boring von Carstein had the coach killed, after b3sh tried to fuse his own spirit into Sparkly Twinkletoes in order to get a performance out of the werewolf. In doing so various rules of necromancy may have been… bent, and a Varghiest was seen near the training pitch last Sunday.

Either way, this league doesn’t have draft picks so the tanking isn’t really achieving much. The Nurgle team has more development. It’s not going to get any easier, and I suspect the Pink Penguinz will join the vast ranks of disbanded bloodbowl teams. Maybe they’ll get an excerpt in the loading screens for bloodbowl 3?

Chances of making playoffs: 0. Chances of making the tabloids: 90%


Closing comments

My main closing comment is to complement the coaches, some of whom are playing their first few games of bloodbowl. I’ve seen no incidents of misconduct, bm etc, and I fully expect europe A to have a strong showing in playoffs!

All the best,

- Losre

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